I knew it was going to be a less than optimal kickoff weekend early on, when Vandy proved it still doesn’t have quite enough PGSTers on the roster for the upper echelon, giving away that late 75 yard TD to Ole Miss. And the game with it.
Then the worst scenario to hit a potato territory since the Gorta Mór (“The Great Hunger”) spread across Ireland in 1845. You probably know it as the Irish Potato Famine. What Idahoans call Saturday is Drochshaol (“the bad life”). Oh, wait, I’m confusing Ireland and Idaho again.
Anyhow, it was Boise State 6, Washington 38. Go UDub.
But the Cards came through. As did future conference mate, Clemson. And the Lock of the Week, Bobby Petrino and the Toppers over the Cats.
So, a 3-2 start on the season ain’t perfect, but, obviously, it could be worse.
This week’s selections.
Notre Dame @ Michigan. Talk about tradition. The Irish in the Big House. Saturday night. Under the lights. The Gipper. Benny Friedman. Listen closely and you can almost here George (Insert Ronnie Reagan voiceover here) and his Wolverine rival chatting right now. GG: “Benny, when in hell did they start playing night games?” BF: “I dunno, Gipp. Pass the corned beef, and the Guildan’s, will ya?” Which is a more civil conversation than the back and forth between coaches, Brian “I Just Got A Contract Extension So I Can Cuss Like I Wanna” Kelly and Brady “I Bleed Maize & Blue” Hoke. I’m frankly tired of all this tradition talk. Tradition now in college sports is faux throwbacks worn by a couple of schlepper schools last Tuesday on the Deuce. Michigan roughed up Central Michigan last week. The Irish did the same with AAC power Temple. To be honest I know very little about either team. Which lack of pertinent info has never stopped me from opining before. So, I’m going with the guys playing at home. Hail to the Victors.
South Carolina @ Georgia. “Hedges? I don’t need no stinkin’ hedges,” said Jadeveon Clowney. Okay, he really didn’t, but I did, in a lame ass attempt to paraphrase and suck dry the famous quote from “Treasure of Sierra Madre.” But here is what’s sick about college pigskin, especially in the south where the Harvey Updykes of the world are the rule not the exception. Mark Richt almost made it to the BCS title game last season. If he loses to the Gamecocks, he’ll join the Dead Man Walking roster. Coach Vizor has his best team ever, a Top 10 outfit. So are the Bulldogs, even though that loss in Death Valley dropped them out officially. I say Clowney’s stomach ailment will have cleared up, that he’ll play every play like he’s the man everybody thinks he is. But it shan’t be enough. Georgia will not start the season 0-2.
Western Kentucky @ Tennessee. Welcome to Week 2 of the Bobby Petrino Fall ’13 Retribution Tour. Last year when he was in Exile on Main Street, Fayetteville, Rocky Top was another school that couldn’t find his number, even though the Vols needed a new coach. Same as You Know Who up the road, who should have learned the error of its ways Saturday last. What does the 45 nil first offering of Austin Peay tell us about the Butch Jones Era in Knoxville? Absolutely nuthin’. What does the Toppers W over the Cats tell us? That Petrino was, and remains, the best offensive mind in college football. But a mighty effort by Western KY isn’t going to be enough to shock the world two weeks in a row. Cue that damn song again.
Miami (Ohio) @ Kentucky. The RedHawks (Where did they come up with these politically correct replacement nicknames?) were nudged 14-52 in their opener. At We Are Marshall. Not quite the auspicious tuneup for a trip to Lexington the MAC squad was hoping for. Mark Stoops didn’t even wait until the first practice after the Wildcats’ opening L to change QBs. Maxwell Smith, come on down. Miami gave up almost 600 yards last week. Which has the Big Blue Nation chomping at the bit. Oh, wait, those are folks in line for Big Blue Madness tickets. Mark it for UK.
Eastern Kentucky @ Louisville. You really expect some sort of expert analysis here? Position by position breakdown? Really? Yes, of course, the Colonels’ OVC compatriot Eastern Illinois boinked San Diego State last weekend. Such a comeuppance shall not occur Saturday at Papa J’s. There is little more to be said of this game, which has all the makings of a truly boring “contest.”
– Seedy K