After Kent State smote — or is that smitted — Bowling Green, combined with Ws by Mizzou, Auburn and our Louisville Cardinals (Only the Hawkeyes let me down), I stand 26-12 on the season. That 68.4 winning percentage ain’t shabby, if I did suffer multiple fractures to my arm, patting myself on the back.
But typing with one hand — that would be five fingers — I trudge ahead as things get interesting in college pigskin. At least as interesting as they can get in a sport that refuses to crown a legitimate national champion.
Let’s get this party started.
Florida State @ North Carolina State. Frankly I’ve chosen this Thursday night encounter to prognosticate, because I want to finish this exercise soon, and kickoff is just a couple hours away. The Wolfpack stand a surprising 5-2. Which is nice. Except that the 2 came in the last 3 games, including its most recent L to East Carolina. (Which state I’ll be damned if I can find on any U.S. map in our household.) Jimbo’s Seminoles may just be the nation’s most surprising team. Don’t hear a lot of “Bring Back Bobby” cheers down Tallahassee way these days. Five in a row since they were plundered by Ooooooooooooklahoma. Most won handily. No reason to stop now. Visitors win.
Tulsa @ Notre Dame. Okay, let’s see if I have this right? Severe weather warnings in South Bend. 50+ MPH winds. But, Brian Kelly forges ahead with practice outdoors. So Declan Sullivan is forced up a tower to film the practice. This is Notre Dame football after all, and since the Irish are playing Tulsa’s Golden Hurricane, a little preparation in dangerous winds is a must. Sullivan’s now RIP because of Kelly’s gross negligence. Bury the rag deep in your face, TD Jesus, now is the time for your tears. In a just world, Kelly would also at the very least be relieved of his duties. With a 4-4 record, the honeymoon’s over anyway. It’s so disgusting. That said, the Irish will one for Declan. What a fitting damn tribute. This is a pick, frankly, I hope I get wrong.
North Texas @ Western Kentucky. Rolling along on a one game winning streak, the Toppers faithful are in a Taggert tizzy. I’ve got a feeling that all Western needed was one to break on through to the other side. That one was last week. This week, North Texas comes to town. Mean Joe Green won’t be runnin’ on the turf for the Lone Star staters. That’s a good thing for the homies. The rest of the Mean Green aren’t much good at 1-6. Toppers make it 2 in a row.
Oregon @ Southern Cal. Now this is a mighty mighty test for my Quack. The Trojans rebounded from consecutive last play setbacks to Stanford and U Dub, by thrashing Cal. There are people who think Lane Kiffin is better at coaching than pubic relations. Well, here’s his chance to prove them right. As much as I love the Ducks, they don’t look like a squad that can finish the regular season without a blemish. But I certainly can’t pick a school with Mike Garrett and OJ Whatisname as alums. Oregon flies. Quack!
Michigan @ Penn State. Welcome to State College, site of this weekend’s Irrelevant Bowl. There will be a pall over the 100,000 or so gathered to watch these former titans. Guys are hurt. There are rumors, still unsubstantiated, that JoPa has had some fresh taxidermy work done, and that he’s more cogent than in recent years. Rich Rod is wishin’ he’d stayed in West Virginny. The game’s been taken off the board by the oddsmakers. Yawn. On a hunch that home field advantage will mean something, I’m going with the Nittany Lions.
– Seedy K