Quack Quakes, Schnell’s Senior Moment, Sooners Soar & More: MMQB (Sunday Style)

Schnell Goes Senile in Motown. On the face of it, FAU’s 17-30 L to Michigan State doesn’t look so bad. Until you read this word for word account from my man Joey the Vig, who was in the house:

Your boy Schmellie, was in fine form yesterday. He made one of the most — let me be kind here — mystifying decisions ever witnessed in a football game anywhere at any level. Less than 3 minutes to play and the Owls are down 16 pts. to my Spartans. FAU has the ball on the Spartan 6-yard line. It’s 4th and goal. Any numbskull — even someone as arithmatically challenged as you Seedy K — with the least bit of counting skills knows 2 tds and 2 two-pt. conversions tie the game. The Schnell calls timeout, presumably to design a play that will score the initial 6 and thrust MSU fans into our normal “here we go again” tizzy. Convert the 2 pts., an onside kick, and Spartan Nation is back to our oh-so-familiar state of anxiety and despair.

But NOOOOOOOOOOOOO . . . The Schnell sends his Owls back on to the field with the field goal unit. Uh…… it must be a friggin’ fake? NOOOOOOOOOOOO . . . The kick sails through the uprights and the Spartans are up 13 pts.

Okay, we say . . . Maybe the Schnell had a senior moment and plans to score two more majors after a nifty onside kick. The Spartans send their “hands team” out and they dutifully await the requisite onsider, but NOOOOOOOOO . . . Fau kicks it deep. Spartans run out the clock.

Senior Schnell’s explanation: “I did what I thought was best. I didn’t think (going for it) was the thing to do.”

Ducks, Sooners, Buckeyes & Tide are all Impressive. Here’s what I know after sitting in front of my HD for 12 hours yesterday (I finally fell asleep during UCLA/ Stanford, awakened by the clanking after dropping the clicker on our hardwood floor.). It’s hard to concentrate on two games at once.

That said, the four superpowers — Okay 3 superpowers plus my Oregon Ducks — all looked boffo. Ohio State picked Jacory Harris four times. Oooooooooklahoma scored the first four times it had the ball, and Landry Jones passed for almost 400 yards. Bama had JoePa wondering if he needed more eye surgery. And Oregon flattened Rocky Top like Mr. Peabody’s coal eater, despite showing up in disappointingly sedate white unis.

So impressive were the Quack, my pal Dave has promised to learn the words to “I Love My Ducks, Sup Witch U Girl?”

Broncos Buster, Or Why Boise State Ain’t Singing “Hello Dolly.” Virginia Tech 16, James Madison 21. 

Cards Not So Strong. So my Cards Crew gathered after yesterday’s lackluster W over EKU.

One question kept being asked — Is there anything about U of L’s performance to be happy about?

The consensus. Uh, well, oh, uh . . . not really.

It’s becoming more obvious by the week how very very bare a cupboard was left when Charlie Strong moved in. These guys give effort. They have a great attitude. They simply aren’t very good, not very good at all.

There might have some minor improvement here and there from Week 1 to Week 2, but I frankly am not astute enough to point it out.

What this season calls for is faith from the faithful. There are going to be Ls aplenty.

Touchdown Jesus’ Tears. For those who have had a bit too much of the whole Fighting Irish hooha through the years, yesterday was a great day.

There was Tom Hammond waxing on about the rainbow over the stadium. Then, as if on cue, Notre Dame scored on a 95 yard bomb. And they was rollin’ down the echoes, talking about Notre Dame Tradition and preparing to petition to the Pope to make Brian Kelly a saint before sundown.

At which point, Denard Robinson led the maize and blue down the field like a hot knife through butter, tallying the winning TD with :27 on the clock.

No more echoes. Hail the Victors.

Oh yeah, by the by, who said this would be the best game of the day? Thank you, thank you, vury much!

BEast Muzzled. So displeased is my friend Dave — yes the same guy who wants an Oregon t-shirt — he bet me yesterday that no Big East team will win a nonconference game against a BCS school all season.

If Marshall doesn’t flat out choke Friday night with the game in hand and almost assured, West Virginia doesn’t win. And the league then has no Ws over any team you’ve heard of this weekend. Ws over Eastern Kentucky, Indiana State, Texas Southern, New Hampshire and Florida International do not exactly qualify as quality wins.

Hottest Seat In The West??? Dan Hawkins (Colorado 7, Cal 52) or Rick Neuheisel (UCLA 0, Stanford 35)?

Tip o’ the Hat to . . . Turner Gill.

His Rock Chalk Jayhawks stunk it up in his opener last week. Kansas 3, North Dakota State 6. Ouch.

His charges turned it around in a major way, providing arguably the best Week 1 to Week 2 improvement.

Kansas 28, #15 Georgia Tech 25.

– Seedy K

5 Comments

  1. Phil
    Posted September 12, 2010 at 6:42 pm | Permalink

    Your comment regarding the talent level is very true. For the past three seasons we were competing with MAC and OVC schools for recruits.

  2. cbcard
    Posted September 12, 2010 at 9:47 pm | Permalink

    Excluding Beaumont we have the worst group of wideouts in all of NCAA football. Including D-III. They have almost as many drops as catches. Boy that Kragthorpe sure could recruit.

  3. Wildcat
    Posted September 13, 2010 at 5:23 pm | Permalink

    Any Notre Dame loss is sweet given their arrogance and claim to great tradition when they have been mediocre at best for almost 20 years. But a loss like the one on Saturday is especially great given they were already celebrating and making Kelly the new Rockne. Just gotta love it.

  4. Wildcat
    Posted September 13, 2010 at 5:25 pm | Permalink

    Notre Dame needs to play all sports in the Big East of be gone in all sports.

  5. WP Themes
    Posted September 24, 2010 at 8:13 am | Permalink

    Nice dispatch and this post helped me alot in my college assignement. Say thank you you on your information.

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